So we were out in the country, which if you live in Toronto means somewhere north of Highway 7, driving along when suddenly we saw these hanging from the trailer hitch of a Dodge Dakota:
OK, they’re truck nuts. A cultural phenom worthy enough to rate an article in Wikipedia, and also the subjects of legislation in several U.S. states to have them banned. ( But can you legislate against bad taste? ) Me the naif had never heard of them till I actually saw them in their lurid pink-toned reality.
Three observations to would-be owners of truck nuts:
- The obvious: don’t they scream “I’m compensating”? Maybe not the best message you want to send to women you want to date?
- If you really think they’re the cat’s ass and must hang them, you maybe want to get a real — not a Dakota!— pick-up, with a hemi? (See 1, above.)
- As a nurse, I have seen scrota by the gazillions. I guarantee yours aren’t as beautiful or large as these, which seem to represent the Platonic ideal of testicularity.
- Is also creepy. (See 1, above.)
With luck, their own ridiculousness will limit their popularity. I’d hate to see them attached to BMWs traipsing down the DVP. . .