As I’ve probably mentioned once or twice before, I am a complete Luddite at heart. If I am asked if technology has increased the net happiness of humanity, I would probably give a firm No as an answer. I view computers and such like a gas station attendant eyes a fifty dollar bill, which is to say, dimly. Now I’ve been having trouble with my Interwebs connection these last couple of weeks, stemming from a lightning strike on my local wireless tower (or thingamajig), and I’ve had intermittent outages ever since.
So, my service was down twice last week, for a short period of time Monday, then on Tuesday evening, it gave up altogether. Fine, I thought, it’s been up again (usually) by the next morning. So I waited.
I was actually okay with that. An Internet holiday, if you will. Sometimes you need a break from the constant clamour of vast amounts of indigestible information. No bothersome phone calls was a bonus. Never for a moment did I think of calling my ISP and finding out what the problem was. In August, my motto is “Sans Souci”.
Thursday. Still no access and no phone. I was beginning to get a little annoyed. “Stupid unreliable Internet company,” I muttered to myself.
But I went to my neighbours’ who I knew had the same service. She looked at me quizzically. “Oh,” she said, “We haven’t had any problems.”
So I went home. And I just happened to glance over at my wireless router and — THE DAMNED THING WAS UNPLUGGED.
Seriously. The cable from the outside to the router was disconnected. For three fricking days.
Needless to say, on the idiocy scale of 1 to 10, I score an impressive 9, which is above Lumbering Oaf but only slightly below Slack-jawed Yokel.
What I don’t understand is how it came unplugged in the first place. Ghosts? The cat? Evil neighbourhood children? Bad Internet karma? How does anything like that happen? Sometimes it is, just pure magic.
[UPDATE: On Twitter, mich0485 wrote: @TorontoEmerg I would’ve liked the story better if u had called the internet company and had some sassy bitch tell u check ur connection lol
Better story, yep. Fortunately, this time I was spared that particular humiliation.]